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Deciding to Be Decisive

Updated: Nov 15, 2021

I can’t tell you how many times I have frustrated myself when I stand in my kitchen, with something like 5 competing priorities swirling in my head.

Take care of the dogs, or begin brewing my morning coffee?

Get my office picked up a little first, or sit down and read?

Go out for a walk before it’s too late or finally work on the blog?

The day I am writing this, my car is in the shop getting the transmission replaced. That decision took a few weeks to happen. But then a couple of hours into the work, I get a phone call.

“The transmission you bought doesn’t fit your car.”

Panic mode.

After having 3 different shops look at my car and it was determined clearly to be the transmission, that narrowed down my choices. I found a used transmission for the exact model and year range of my Toyota Venza on eBay.

We still had to decide if we should just sell the car outright, even though we still owe money. We added my father-in-law into the conversation since they had recently moved to live with us on our property they helped us buy.

No, don’t sell the car. If the shop is willing to work with me, they will allow me to buy the transmission and have it shipped directly to them, which is what I did. I drove the car over, dropped it off and it was today they could finally get to it.

Turns out when you buy a transmission that was sent directly from Japan, there are parts that don’t go directly into a car manufactured in North America! So, in the half an hour from the time of being told this bit of information before he called back, we were in a mode of how to decide on what to do next!

We had resolved to try to send it back, get our money back and try something else.

The tech at the shop was very helpful, talking to the seller and after about half an hour of me panicking, called back to let us know (fill in the blank here) parts could just be taken from the old transmission and added to the new to allow for the install to happen.

Upping the Game

It’s interesting how we can make such important decisions when there’s more at stake. Or, if less time seems to be a factor, such as when I was told it wouldn’t have been feasible to have a car all pulled apart sitting in one of the bays at the shop and making sure his tech got paid. We had to move on to what was next.

A powerful thought experiment is to ask yourself when it comes to a pornography habit or addiction, What decisions do I need to make, and by when?

Examples could be:

  • Do I stop consuming pornography cold turkey?

  • What consequences should I put into place if I slip?

  • Will this be a pass/fail or progressive journey?

  • Who is someone I trust I can tell about this?

These are just a few decisions needing to be addressed as you begin to look at a life without pornography.

Here’s one important decision, I always encourage men to make: Decide if you can overcome.

In a previous video I posted to my Facebook page, I briefly talked about the power of having hope. Having it makes all the difference from the very beginning. First, decide you can overcome. Then, make other decisions based on this powerful conviction.

After, it becomes a day-to-day and often temptation-by-temptation, moment-to-moment series of small decisions along the journey.

As time goes on you realize you have been making those quiet decisions that perhaps feels small but are in fact life-changing pivots re-training your brain in a better direction.

Now go make a small decision today!

With Blessing Along the Journey,


PS: Here's another decision that could change you forever – talking to me about your pornography. Click here to schedule your 30-minute Restoration Session today.

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